Friday, June 15, 2012

I don't wanna fight... let's makeup

I used to swear that I would never wear mascara.
this is not pretty.
this looks like tarantula legs.
Reasons why I swore I would never wear mascara:

  1. I already have dark eyelashes .
  2. I was a wicked tomboy growing up and have always poo pooed lots of makeup useage.
  3. Mascara is thick and sticky and clumpy, no matter what the commercials say...
  4. The commercials for mascara are the worst commercials on teevee (other than previews for Toddlers in Tiaras. If you watch that show, get off my blog right now, you don't belong in theindieattic)
  5. Mascara is much too expensive.
  6. There are too many different choices between brands.
  7. What do all the different shaped brushes do? 
  8. The girls in those commercials are totally wearing fake eye lashes.
  9. For a painter, I have shaky hands and end up smearing it on my face (I just hear the operation *BUZZZ* when this happens)
But here is the biggest reason why I swore I would never wear mascara...

   10.  What is the difference between black, very black, super black, black/brown, brown, blue/black?

Some of those questions still haunt me to this day (okay, mostly all of them) but for the most part I have grown up and learned how to put on mascara. But I would like to address #6 above. Over the years I have had many a tube of mascara, borrowed tubes thick and thin, brushes winged, curved, combed and weighed the differences between waterproof and organic (something about "natural" and mascara don't jive too well with me) 

So I thought I would review the mascara I remember using. As a moderate makeup wearer, you can trust me. Aaaaaand we are off. 

Mascara #1    Lashblast from CoverGirl (waterproof in brown/black) 

This is the mascara that my mom uses and by default, I use when I'm home because who remembers to pack makeup? Not me. I like this kind, though I am not a big waterproof fan. You think I would be, seeing as I can cry like its my job but i've found that waterproof smears just the same and leaves you with thick now waterproof clumps and smears on your cheeks that you cannot rub of without making your face look like you just blew up your bunsen burner in chem class. At least you can rub the normal smears off. This mascara helps lift your lashes up and stay in place for the majority of the day. But warning the tube is so thick, it feels like you are holding a club. 6/10 

Mascara #2   The Colossal Volume Express by Mabyelline (very black) 

First of all, I bought this mascara because of the name. Come on, I don't care how seriously you take yourself, this is hilarious.  This mascara is very black, aptly named. I would not use this as a normal day look because I would look curiously like a raccoon. But I like what it does to the lashes, it clings without clumping and makes my lashes look longer without feeling heavy (regardless of how heavy they look, which is heavy) Heavy, heavy, i'll type it one more time, heavy 7/10

Mascara #3   Falsies Volume Express by Mabyelline (black) 

I got this mascara because it was in the little basket at the end of the makeup aisle, marking it on sale. So $5 rather than $8. I found this ironic because the commercial shows a leather clad model slapping this stuff that requires no false eyelashes on her false eyelashes. Well you just have to see it for yourself, plus its funny because it is in French. 


So this mascara was crap, clumped around the outer corners of my eye and would not wash off even though it wasn't waterproof. Also the wand has this little section (you can see it in the picture) that is flexible and makes it impossible to brush onto the lash because the teeth hold the lash and your hand just bends the wand down and you end up poking your eye and blinking the wet mascara onto your cheek. 4/10

Mascara #4  Great Last by Maybelline (black/waterproof) 

This is one of the cheapest contenders and it might be that way for a reason, while the color was good and it was the good kind of waterproof that stays on your lashes (not flakes down on your cheeks after watching the first ten minutes of say UP or Braveheart) But overall it was just really clumpy and there was no separation or definition between the lashes. The tube is iconic with its slime green and bubble gum pink coloring but if you use this, remember to use a comb or a clean mascara wand to separate the lashes. 5/10

Seeing the relativity low scores, I'm not much of a mascara girl, I prefer eye liner or brown/gold shadow (if anything on my eyes). But just remember to change your tube of mascara every 4 months or you could get nasty eye infections. Eww. I had double pink eye once on a mission trip to South Carolina. Along with strep and a sinus infection... please don't let that ever happen to you. 

So I was due for a new tube and decided to buy intense i-color by Almay (black flash for brown eyes) Apparently they have a new line that is color specific. I'm not sure if there are gold or brown shimmers in the mascara, but hopefully it makes my muddy eyes look a nice mocha brown, with swirls of green... maybe they can look like a grasshopper (steamed milk, espresso shot, mint syrup, chocolate syrup) rather than a mocha. Maybe I should have gotten mascara for Hazel eyes to eliminate the coffee conversation. Oh well. 
you are pretty, 
rach

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